What if the labels that were supposed to define you – daughter, wife, mother, Catholic, lesbian – were the very things keeping you from being whole?
You Only Live Twice is the unflinching story of a life lived in two genders– first as someone trying to meet everyone else’s expectations, then as the man Jay always knew himself to be. With raw honesty and unexpected humor, Jay chronicles the confusion of childhood crushes on female teachers, the suffocating weight of wedding dresses and gender roles, the darkness of psychiatric hospitals and addiction, and the terror and relief of finally speaking an unspeakable truth.
This is a memoir about survival and transformation, about the price of living inauthentically and the courage it takes to claim your own life. It’s about being a mom while becoming a man, about losing relationships and finding unexpected love, about the messy, non-linear path from self-hatred to self-acceptance.
For anyone who has ever felt like a stranger in their own skin, or wondered if it’s too late to start over, Jay’s story offers something invaluable: proof that you can dismantle your entire life and rebuild it into something true.
ISBN: 9781961347854 Pride & Joy Publishing
Jay DeFazio (he/him) is a licensed educator, artist, author, and collaborator. As a speaker and teacher, he presents on a variety of topics from diversity in the workplace to arts integration, creativity, and storytelling through art.
Jay has worked with many organizations in the Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky metro area including the Cincinnati Art Museum, ArtWorks, Cincinnati Public Library, US Bank, the Art Academy of Cincinnati, SOS Art, and numerous local high schools.
In 2020 Jay received ArtWorks’ Emerging Artist Award and grant to create an art project with the trans community. The success of that program earned a Northern Kentucky Artist of the Year award in 2021.
Contact Jay at mrjdefazio@gmail.com
